Love is all it takes

So, a three year old runs and hugs you like there’s no tomorrow. Gives you an enormous ear to ear smile, his eyes gleaming, seems like saying, “you are my hero.” That’s the kind of welcome I get each morning from each of my students. Their warmth and passionate touch brings me to reality, jolts an energizer in me and keeps me young at heart. 

My work in itself is a joy.  It reminds me of the gigantic responsibility each one of us have as an adult. Our prime goal to suffice in this world with our positive contribution to it.  As an educator I thrive to achieve this target on a daily basis.

At times its utterly challenging to keep doing what I believe is fruitful in my objective.  And yes, it collides with those of my co-workers and most of all parents and guardians of my little ones.  The only happy medium between this entire tug is the look in these children’s innocent faces and we give in with all our love, open arms and smiles.  This world is then a much happier place.

Love is what makes it all worthwhile.  It is that exact kind of guidance and nurturing children need at all ages to be able to follow their dreams. To be able to believe in themselves. To be able to draw their own understanding and comprehending at their own pace without being unnecessarily pushed around.   To be able to be comfortable with their thought trail and where ever it may lead to in their own imaginary world without being held back by adults prejudices.

This kind of nurturing can be found in a Montessori environment, where children themselves, hold the key to exploration.  Here, they have the freedom to learn with their own pace.  Age is merely a number in this kind of environment and children’s progression is usually based on their individual abilities.  Therefore, if one observes, it would be an astonishing treat to his senses to easily witness many four year olds reading first grade level books or doing addition problems and beyond.  Many of them even helping their much younger peers. 

Such a practice is one of the many common grounds upon which a Montessori environment functions.  It is undoubtedly interestingly mentally stimulating, where children are intrigued and challenged with the aid of the Montessori materials. It allows them to thoroughly understand a specific concept in a more sophisticated, defined manner by working with it, rather than a teacher trying to explain it periphrastically. Hence, Montessori teachers are just eager passive guides whereas the children are the active participants. It is more of a learner based environment than a typical teacher directed classroom.             By: Ifra N. Khoso

Repetition in a Montessori Classroom

Ifra Khoso, Yahoo Contributor Network
Apr 11, 2012


Every child is a star in his own way. Montessori environment enables a child to explore his own capabilities and make self- corrections. Through self- correction, one is able to channel his mind towards creativity


Montessori environment is interestingly stimulating. It not only intrigues one personally but enlightens and freshens each of one’s senses, if not to its pinnacle but high enough to question one’s own actions.  This particular attribute develops in one’s personality through, “Repetition”.

Repetition is what enhances the process of learning. It not only makes us perfect… (Remember the saying, “Practice makes you perfect”) but also makes one aware of his abilities. It is through repetition that we become self critiques.  It opens uncountable doors of the human mind and the brain functions at a much challenging level. It is repetition which arouses curiosity, urges to reach perfection and encourages self exploration. This is the reason why, science in all of its branches remains one of the still, most ongoing developed subject.  It is perhaps repetition of many failures that has lead to numerous mind blowing inventions which has made our lives convenient in many ways.

What is repetition in a Montessori environment?

It is simply the freedom given to a child to repeat an activity, practice or work with it as many times as he wants to till his inner urge to do so is satisfied, provided that he does not misuse his freedom to practice in an unproductive way, i-e starts throwing the materials, taking them in his mouth or ignoring it by engaging himself in a completely different activity.

Repetition is one of the vital stats upon which a Montessori environment thrives.  In such an environment different subjects are either directly or indirectly linked up together.  For example…let’s take the simple activity (from practical life area in a Montessori environment) of pouring water equally from a pitcher into four glasses. When the directress is presenting this activity to the child, she doesn’t mention that she will pour equal amount of water into all the four glasses. It is through her careful presentation that the child observes it but when the activity is done by a 3 year old alone, he comes to that conclusion after numerous repetitions. Not only that he indirectly and subconsciously gets hands on experience to the concept of division, volume and weight.  And these concepts only become subconsciously vivid through repetition.

Coming to one’s own conclusions, making and self correcting one’s own mistakes and learning through one’s own repetition is far more fruitful and long lasting. It is this experience that makes learning fun and lively. This important freedom to repeat and explore instills lifelong love and thrust for learning and exploration in a child which is utmost necessary to progress in practical life.   By: Ifra N. Khoso

Crying …A natural instinct.

Crying, like eating, sleeping is a natural surviving trait of a living being. That’s why animals are also given this ability. We usually cry when we are hurt, physically or emotionally.  

New born cries for survival, the message is clear, “Please take care of my “Needs” “.   Showing love to a new born is his need just, like feeding, changing, bathing, sleeping. Love surpasses all emotions. It makes one feel better and brighter. When new born needs are not fulfilled, he cries in discomfort and distress. Thus crying is primarily the communication gadget at this stage.

Why does a 3 year old cry when going to school? There could be a number of reasons both physical and emotional.

Maybe the child is tired, didn’t get a good night sleep, and didn’t get a healthy breakfast to start off his day.

Maybe didn’t get enough time with his parents, or maybe he just simply needs that tight squishy hug.  

Separation in every stage is one of the greatest maturity levels that one accomplishes at his own pace but when that level is pushed, distress comes in and results in insecurity, thus crying.

Parents usually ask me, “Why is my child crying?”  I, too find myself asking the same question over and over again, not just regarding my own two precious babies but all my precious students too.

I ask myself that is the child comfortable with me? Is the child comfortable in the environment? Is he getting along with his peers and pals? Is the environment interestingly stimulating? Is he getting love?

Yes, children are definitely getting love from me…and sincerity too. If you ask me what each child in my class is doing, I will tell you like a recorded tape, their academic level and their emotional behavior in various situations. I know each of my children like the back of my hand. And yes, I am sincere. Sincere to their needs, their growth and development both academically and emotionally.

Usually I come to the conclusion that a child is crying just to get attention. Plain, simple attention or working out their parents in other cases.  At 3 years old, the expected toddler behavior is “My way or no way.” It’s how they are trying to find their own limits by testing the limits of the adults around them. This is the age when they are developing their behavior and learning how people react to it.

I usually explain with kind words when a 3 year old is acting adamant. And surprisingly to many of you it does work. One needs to feel respected more than loved and once that understanding is build, relationships between a 3 year and a 30 year old strengthens.  Though at times adults need to ignore and just go with the flow of things but yet at the same time making sure that stubbornness in toddlers shouldn’t become a habit instead it’s a phase that passes away if handled carefully.

Now if a 6 year old is acting stubborn and crying for no reason, then kind words are replaced by tough love. By this age if a child is stubborn, it usually means that the adult has been feeding on to this behavior and so along the way it has become a strong part and parcel of the child’s personality in most cases.

A stubborn child should also be treated with respect and love but more so given the space he needs to collect his thoughts. Boundaries and expectations of the adults in his life should be crystal clear. According to Dr. Maria Montessori, the child at this age is more like an adult.

 Crying not necessarily needs to have a legitimate reason all the time.  In all cases and circumstances a warm cozy hug given to the crier definitely consoles him and sends the message across that, “Somebody does CARE.” Love surpasses everything and all of us need that assuring hug once in a while, so think about children….they need it.  Reach out to them.

Have you hugged a child today? J

By: Ifra N. Khoso