"NAYA PAKISTAN " ( HOPE WITH IMRAN KHAN).

As a first generation immigrant from Pakistan, I have always been gratified to associate myself with my birth place although find it very heart wrenching when people around me ask, where are you from , socket out my heavy Paki, British accent  and obviously my so identified popularity of being a Muslim. It’s even more astonishing when after told that I am originally from Pakistan, the queries begin, where is that? Or what country is that?  Apparently it was my bias mind set of people’s general knowledge and for the longest of time I laughed at their so- created bubble in which they resided.

 Until of course the Bin Laden façade and his hidden place, a region in Pakistan. Until  Of course the so known popular religion which has suddenly become the talk of the town thanks to some psychopaths who feel the necessity of associating themselves  with this beautiful  religion. The religion whose greeting in translation means, “May Peace be with you”.

All of a sudden I find myself, being looked with a very questioning, inquisitive and mocking eye, Oh so you are from Pakistan, is it where the women are bound to cover their faces? and isn’t it  “The Muslim” country.

My answer to such negligence has always been with a polite smile no, women are not restricted and yes, it is Islamic Republic of Pakistan. With History legends from Founders such as Quaid-e-Azam, Poets like, Allama Iqbal and Faiz, social workers like Abdul Sattar Edhi, Oscar winner and Film maker, Sharmeen Obaid Chinoy, Yes, she is a Pakistani woman. There is always two sides of a coin. With great sportsmen from Jahanghir Khan ranking the top Squash players of his time to all- rounder world cricketer, Chancellor of the University of Bradford and founder of the  Shaukat Khanum Cancer Hospital and Research Center, Imran Khan.

Yes, these are the true faces of Pakistan.

 I deeply wondered how come the popularity of the country is not centered on them. A haunting question for all Pakistanis. Especially for the ones living abroad. What have we given the world to think about Pakistan?

 

With the up- coming elections and facebook, twitter pouring over with the “ Naya Pakistan” ( New and Refined Pakistan) ideology, the hope has not, yet been lost in the darkness. In an argument with a very close friend of mine who is also an immigrant, I came to the conclusion that even when one has nothing, hope is still there. It still resides with triumph and has the innate ability to conquer fear. 

I was never into politics or for that matter enthralled by any Politian’s ideas. To me it’s a game of thorns. A sour candy with sugar coating until one bites it, he wouldn’t really know what the actual flavor is. With everyone raving about how great a Politian the King Khan is, I  listened, heard, read all of the slogans supporting him and thought to myself, an all-rounder in cricket, what does he know how to move about in the game board with players who have been champions in fooling the nation over and over again. You see, to me it was all a pun. For all I knew Imran Khan is just a great Legendary player in the world of Cricket until my friend pointed out his driven, persistent work which he has been doing since he became the chairman of the Political Party, Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaaf ( Movement for Justice) in 1996.

I was already conscious of the Khan’s enigmatic personality and still proudly have recollection of my first meeting with him as a seventh or eighth grader in a fund raising event for the Cancer Hospital. I knew he has the power to mesmerize, a certain rare caliber which he has been gifted with. The tireless personality and believe in the righteous act, is what Imran is all about.

I argued with a friend of mine what good can one do if one is surrounded by vultures all around. Isn’t it better to be mad with the rest of the world than to be wise alone? And for that matter how long one can hold on to sanity? For me it’s all in the actions. Words are just a bunch of letters framed with great mastery, used as perfect veils to mask the true intentions.

 Imran proved me wrong.

 He is the first Pakistani Politian who conducted intra-party elections and 35 % of the tickets went to the individuals under the age of forty. His action spoke loudly, very evidently and strikingly impressive ….more than his words.

Naya Pakistan (New and Refined Pakistan) doesn’t look like a bemused dream when I look at Imran. To me it seems very possible, very real, very to the core. A cricketer who has the ability to move the entire nation over a game of bat and ball, an individual who has the stature for founding the Shaukat Khanum Cancer Hospital and Research Center, undeniably has more  than that as a Pakistani who is willingly, sanguinely taking the charge of a country with so many handicapped records.  For me as a Paki immigrant in a foreign country, he is not only the hope for a “Naya Pakistan “but also a Pakistani who can give our future generations, a country to brag about by all positive means.

On May 11, 2013…Let’s not just give him a chance, let’s give him the charge.

By: Ifra N. Khoso

 

 

 

And so the "Dream Continues.....

  As an educator, the true essence of education holds meaningful to me not just "Teaching".    Liberating one's mind from the social taboos is what flourishes a society as the whole


And so the dream continues.....

For a free America...Liberty and justice for All...

A few days back I had an opportunity to meet with one of the candidates running for LA county Judge. While chatting on many various issues, the main topic of the night drifted towards our youth. It was overwhelming, sorrowful and even scary to learn the demographics as to how our society functions...what with gangsters, drug mafia, graffiti, boys on the streets and then Rodeo Drive, Hollywood, firefighters, mega lotto’s and above all the Law itself.. Where does our youth stand in all this??? Are we living in two parallel worlds???

Raising two children of my own, I question my decisions every day. I read about Travyon Martin and Shaima Alawadi and my heart went out to both the families. How does it all starts? Was among the many questions which popped up. Are we engaging our children in meaningful activities? How does one gets tangled so haphazardly that it’s rigid to find your way back?
From a Parent point of view we do what we can best. Provide them with great home environment all complete with the "i" gadgets... enroll them in the best private schools available in town and take them to visit mickey mouse during spring break.
As an educator's point of view this is not enough...My job is not only teaching "academics" or making sure the child is able to read the next level book or do addition and subtraction problems.
It goes beyond that.

One of my 5 year old was reading a biography about Rosa Louise McCauley Parks. She gave me a puzzled look. The look had, if not a hundred at least ten queries clearly posted on her innocent face. More like those questions were prodding my mind and she wanted me to assure her that such a time never existed or does not anymore. I lowered my gaze and tried explaining it to her that " World is a beautiful place" but caught myself amidst realizing that I am guarding her from the truth...the truth she needs to have some knowledge of. I started by explaining how the times were different when Rosa Parks was alive, how skin color, language and religion played a very vital and substantial role in one’s identity. How the times have changed and everybody is “Equal.” She commented, “Rosa had the same skin color as some of my friends in the classroom.” I smiled at her and said, “Sure she did.”

For a 5 year old understanding the complexity of the skin color and making analogies between Rosa Parks and her friends was very simple. What about us adults? We still haven’t figured out that how and where we are born is not our decision but how and what we do is really a choice definitely made by us.

When Martin Luther King, Jr. gave his famous speech, “I have a dream…” little that he knew, over time his speech will only make him an icon on modern American liberalism and a federal holiday. Even now after four decades we are still wondering whether we will witness such a dream in total reality not just in superior echelons.
And so the “Dream continues…….

BY: Ifra N. Khoso

Perception...

If we all want an eye for an eye, the entire world will be blind
.........Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi

Carefully pondering on this sentence and putting it into action, we will definitely find ourselves in a dark hollow and aimlessly drowning in it without the hope of touching the solid ground of oneness, brotherhood and respect for each other. Luckily, there is still harmony left to balance out all evil. We have our children, our hope for a better tomorrow, our reason to strive hard and yet harder to provide them with sound and quality education, vital guidelines and sincere virtues.
In any society where darkness lingers in any form, brightness has to find its way to counterpart it. As adults we have responsibility for upbringing our children in clarity of both so that they are able to distinguish between the choices which are good and those which are not so good. The challenge lies when the decision has to be made between the better and the best. Such attributes need to be instilled from the very beginning. It starts by respecting one self. The potion of believing in oneself, in one's strengths and recognizing one's drawbacks and then self-correcting requires a big heart.
One cannot make it next to perfection if one has not travelled the path of mistakes. Repetition of self-correction usually leads towards perfection. The journey no doubt seems endless at the beginning but along the path lies the true definition of success. It should not be the end destination that matters but the winding hurdles and evicting them, the utmost concern. How one encounters , deals and then overcomes them, are all the ingredients of a hero in the making...a hero of a much higher caliber.

Children need not see this world as a chess board where winning is the absolute condition rather than a blank canvas on which they should be allowed to leave their own individual strokes with confidence, uniqueness and positive advancement for the society as the whole.

By: Ifra N. KHoso

Love is all it takes

So, a three year old runs and hugs you like there’s no tomorrow. Gives you an enormous ear to ear smile, his eyes gleaming, seems like saying, “you are my hero.” That’s the kind of welcome I get each morning from each of my students. Their warmth and passionate touch brings me to reality, jolts an energizer in me and keeps me young at heart. 

My work in itself is a joy.  It reminds me of the gigantic responsibility each one of us have as an adult. Our prime goal to suffice in this world with our positive contribution to it.  As an educator I thrive to achieve this target on a daily basis.

At times its utterly challenging to keep doing what I believe is fruitful in my objective.  And yes, it collides with those of my co-workers and most of all parents and guardians of my little ones.  The only happy medium between this entire tug is the look in these children’s innocent faces and we give in with all our love, open arms and smiles.  This world is then a much happier place.

Love is what makes it all worthwhile.  It is that exact kind of guidance and nurturing children need at all ages to be able to follow their dreams. To be able to believe in themselves. To be able to draw their own understanding and comprehending at their own pace without being unnecessarily pushed around.   To be able to be comfortable with their thought trail and where ever it may lead to in their own imaginary world without being held back by adults prejudices.

This kind of nurturing can be found in a Montessori environment, where children themselves, hold the key to exploration.  Here, they have the freedom to learn with their own pace.  Age is merely a number in this kind of environment and children’s progression is usually based on their individual abilities.  Therefore, if one observes, it would be an astonishing treat to his senses to easily witness many four year olds reading first grade level books or doing addition problems and beyond.  Many of them even helping their much younger peers. 

Such a practice is one of the many common grounds upon which a Montessori environment functions.  It is undoubtedly interestingly mentally stimulating, where children are intrigued and challenged with the aid of the Montessori materials. It allows them to thoroughly understand a specific concept in a more sophisticated, defined manner by working with it, rather than a teacher trying to explain it periphrastically. Hence, Montessori teachers are just eager passive guides whereas the children are the active participants. It is more of a learner based environment than a typical teacher directed classroom.             By: Ifra N. Khoso

Repetition in a Montessori Classroom

Ifra Khoso, Yahoo Contributor Network
Apr 11, 2012


Every child is a star in his own way. Montessori environment enables a child to explore his own capabilities and make self- corrections. Through self- correction, one is able to channel his mind towards creativity


Montessori environment is interestingly stimulating. It not only intrigues one personally but enlightens and freshens each of one’s senses, if not to its pinnacle but high enough to question one’s own actions.  This particular attribute develops in one’s personality through, “Repetition”.

Repetition is what enhances the process of learning. It not only makes us perfect… (Remember the saying, “Practice makes you perfect”) but also makes one aware of his abilities. It is through repetition that we become self critiques.  It opens uncountable doors of the human mind and the brain functions at a much challenging level. It is repetition which arouses curiosity, urges to reach perfection and encourages self exploration. This is the reason why, science in all of its branches remains one of the still, most ongoing developed subject.  It is perhaps repetition of many failures that has lead to numerous mind blowing inventions which has made our lives convenient in many ways.

What is repetition in a Montessori environment?

It is simply the freedom given to a child to repeat an activity, practice or work with it as many times as he wants to till his inner urge to do so is satisfied, provided that he does not misuse his freedom to practice in an unproductive way, i-e starts throwing the materials, taking them in his mouth or ignoring it by engaging himself in a completely different activity.

Repetition is one of the vital stats upon which a Montessori environment thrives.  In such an environment different subjects are either directly or indirectly linked up together.  For example…let’s take the simple activity (from practical life area in a Montessori environment) of pouring water equally from a pitcher into four glasses. When the directress is presenting this activity to the child, she doesn’t mention that she will pour equal amount of water into all the four glasses. It is through her careful presentation that the child observes it but when the activity is done by a 3 year old alone, he comes to that conclusion after numerous repetitions. Not only that he indirectly and subconsciously gets hands on experience to the concept of division, volume and weight.  And these concepts only become subconsciously vivid through repetition.

Coming to one’s own conclusions, making and self correcting one’s own mistakes and learning through one’s own repetition is far more fruitful and long lasting. It is this experience that makes learning fun and lively. This important freedom to repeat and explore instills lifelong love and thrust for learning and exploration in a child which is utmost necessary to progress in practical life.   By: Ifra N. Khoso

Crying …A natural instinct.

Crying, like eating, sleeping is a natural surviving trait of a living being. That’s why animals are also given this ability. We usually cry when we are hurt, physically or emotionally.  

New born cries for survival, the message is clear, “Please take care of my “Needs” “.   Showing love to a new born is his need just, like feeding, changing, bathing, sleeping. Love surpasses all emotions. It makes one feel better and brighter. When new born needs are not fulfilled, he cries in discomfort and distress. Thus crying is primarily the communication gadget at this stage.

Why does a 3 year old cry when going to school? There could be a number of reasons both physical and emotional.

Maybe the child is tired, didn’t get a good night sleep, and didn’t get a healthy breakfast to start off his day.

Maybe didn’t get enough time with his parents, or maybe he just simply needs that tight squishy hug.  

Separation in every stage is one of the greatest maturity levels that one accomplishes at his own pace but when that level is pushed, distress comes in and results in insecurity, thus crying.

Parents usually ask me, “Why is my child crying?”  I, too find myself asking the same question over and over again, not just regarding my own two precious babies but all my precious students too.

I ask myself that is the child comfortable with me? Is the child comfortable in the environment? Is he getting along with his peers and pals? Is the environment interestingly stimulating? Is he getting love?

Yes, children are definitely getting love from me…and sincerity too. If you ask me what each child in my class is doing, I will tell you like a recorded tape, their academic level and their emotional behavior in various situations. I know each of my children like the back of my hand. And yes, I am sincere. Sincere to their needs, their growth and development both academically and emotionally.

Usually I come to the conclusion that a child is crying just to get attention. Plain, simple attention or working out their parents in other cases.  At 3 years old, the expected toddler behavior is “My way or no way.” It’s how they are trying to find their own limits by testing the limits of the adults around them. This is the age when they are developing their behavior and learning how people react to it.

I usually explain with kind words when a 3 year old is acting adamant. And surprisingly to many of you it does work. One needs to feel respected more than loved and once that understanding is build, relationships between a 3 year and a 30 year old strengthens.  Though at times adults need to ignore and just go with the flow of things but yet at the same time making sure that stubbornness in toddlers shouldn’t become a habit instead it’s a phase that passes away if handled carefully.

Now if a 6 year old is acting stubborn and crying for no reason, then kind words are replaced by tough love. By this age if a child is stubborn, it usually means that the adult has been feeding on to this behavior and so along the way it has become a strong part and parcel of the child’s personality in most cases.

A stubborn child should also be treated with respect and love but more so given the space he needs to collect his thoughts. Boundaries and expectations of the adults in his life should be crystal clear. According to Dr. Maria Montessori, the child at this age is more like an adult.

 Crying not necessarily needs to have a legitimate reason all the time.  In all cases and circumstances a warm cozy hug given to the crier definitely consoles him and sends the message across that, “Somebody does CARE.” Love surpasses everything and all of us need that assuring hug once in a while, so think about children….they need it.  Reach out to them.

Have you hugged a child today? J

By: Ifra N. Khoso

Happy Parenting

As a Parent its very heart breaking to see our precious little ones in tears. Yes, I understand that...I am a mom. We parents, not only have to deal with the tears of our little ones but our own as well. How many of us parents, feel guilty when we leave a crying child in a stranger's arm?

Whatever our circumstances are whether we are working, running around to do errands or simply going to a party. We feel the pinch deep down when closing those doors behind our crying babies.
 Guess what...its normal. Normal to feel the separation anxiety.
Life has to go on, daily rituals need to be fulfilled and most of us have to report to work and we simply cannot tag along our precious children. They need to learn as well, thats a very simple realistic fact.

What we can do as parents:
Foremost create a bond of trust with your child. Assure him that you will always be there for him no matter what.

Talk positive about caregivers, school teachers and school.

Find a school which you are comfortable with, keep in mind the physical challenges, drop off & pick up time. Close to your house.  Sometimes physical proximities can add on to axiety in parents and ultimately felt by children.

Make sure to do a  thorough background check of the school and the teachers or caregivers.
Also keep in mind to check on the credentials.

Remember, sometimes the best teacher has no great credential at all but her attitude makes it a whole lot difference so word of mouth has to be the strongest recommendation.

Never talk negative about school and teachers in your child's presence.

Try to get to know your child's teacher as a person rather than just a teacher.

And always remember children tend to test our limitations, they are different with different adults.

Once your child starts school, please  try to make short precise goodbyes. Tagging along in the classroom and staying for long doesnt help. It doesnt help your crying child or you at all.. Remember it doesnt bother the teachers at all...they are trained to deal with it and used to crying noises around them all day long. So who is actually at loss?????

Tell your child that, " you will be back to pick him up after school." Wish him to have a great day & LEAVE.
The longer you stay the more anxious you and your child will become.

Now dont get me wrong, feel free to watch and observe your child from a distance where he or she cannot see you at all.

Also if you as a  parent feel anxious about sending your children to school, trust me.. your children will feel that anxiety in you. So try to atleast appear joyful infront of them even though you may feel your heart is ready to jump out.

"Happy Parenting":)By: Ifra N. Khoso